As we grow older, life scatters us across different paths, from careers, relationships, and new cities to having families of our own. Maintaining connection with our moms becomes occasionally challenging. With time slipping away and conversations growing shorter, the woman whom we once shared every detail of our day with becomes someone we catch up with on holidays or birthdays. Yet, no matter how far we go or how much life changes, there are gentle ways to keep the bond with our moms deeply rooted:

1. Allowing Your Relationship to Evolve as Two Adults. There comes an unavoidable, quiet turning point in life when your relationship with your mom shifts. One where you start perceiving her as just like you, someone with her own stories, fears, and dreams. Beyond seeking protection or permission, your connection with her becomes about inviting her to be a part of your journey as an adult. Each time you share your thoughts, check up on her, or open up, the relationship transcends the traditional parent-child bond.


2. Amid the distance, try to be present. Living somewhere afar or simply leading separate day-to-day lives doesn’t have to disconnect you from your parents. Although there may be a lack of proximity, you can still let your mom feel your presence through little and meaningful ways. Perhaps a picture you saw online reminded you of her; you can show it to her by sending her a text. Remember that every notification on her phone from you is a dainty reminder that she matters to you.


3. Saying the Things You Could’ve Said. As seasons turn, it’s easy to fall into the unintentional habit of presuming the people we love know how we truly feel about them. In the way they are precious by sentiment, love, appreciation, and gratitude are meant to be expressed out loud and without hesitation. On special occasions and day-to-day quiet moments, let your mom know how much you love her. Life has a way of moving fast, but there’s always a way to slow it down long enough to speak out the words your mom would remember.

Fostering a bond with your mom as you age can offer a whole new layer of understanding, intimacy, and appreciation. Connecting with your mom doesn’t have to rely on time and proximity, it can similarly count on effort and intention. The more we make space to stay connected with our moms, the more we discover shared growth we might have missed before. Simple gestures of love can help cultivate a healthier, longer and better relationship with our moms.